


Little Toy Guns

by ZinevichS



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort/Angst, Dark Past, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Physical Abuse, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2016-01-11
Packaged: 2018-05-13 04:30:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5694823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZinevichS/pseuds/ZinevichS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the reader was a child, their father had emotionally and physically abused them and their mom.</p><p>The brothers didn't know.</p><p>Dean didn't know and he doesn't know that some things he does makes you ache.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little Toy Guns

**Author's Note:**

> The songs that inspired me was: Little Toy Guns and Blown Away, both by Carrie Underwood

_'You can't just stare at other women. I'm your wife! We have a child!'_

_You heard your dad scoff. 'I can do whatever I want.'_

_'Like hell you can! Who do you think you are?'_

_'Don't raise your voice at me! You are supposed to respect my authority. I'm the one who brings the money in.'_

_Your mom laughed, 'Ya we're barely getting by.'_

_You heard a slap and your mom's cry. You put your hands over your ears, trying to block their fighting from your ears._

_'I wish words were like little toy guns.'_

You were snapped from your memories when Dean laid a hand on your shoulder, causing you to jump.

"You okay Y/N? You look pretty shaken."

You nodded and slipped from his grasp, "I'm just a little tired. I'm going to go take a nap." You gave him a kiss goodbye and went to your bedroom, going to sleep.

_Your dad stepped through the door stumbling. You watched your mom go up to him to try to help him, get him to bed._

_When she took his arm he threw her off, 'Get off me. I don't need your help.'_

_Your mother watched him walk away. You moved aside so he wouldn't hit you, he grunted, 'Out of my way.'_

_Your mother grabbed you by the shoulders and held you to her body. You both watched him stumble to his room._

You tossed and turned in your sleep. Dean watched you tossing and turning. He couldn't know what was making you restless.

_'How was work babe?'_

_Your dad shoved past your mom and went to the fridge, pulling out a beer._

_Your mom just looked down._

_Your dad slammed his bottle down, causing you and your mom to jump._

_He stood up and walked over to your mom, he raised a hand and smacked her, her head snapping to the right._

_'Why the fuck isn't dinner ready?'_

_You watched as your dad had proceeded to hit your mother._

You were shocked from your sleep, a scream on your lips.

You hadn't noticed the arms wrapped around you.

You were a shaking mess.

"-Sh. You're okay."

You looked up at Dean. He looked down at you, "What were you dreaming about?"

You untangled yourself from him and pulled away, "It's nothing. I'm fine. I'm going to get some coffee."

You left Dean sitting there, staring at where you just were, with a heavy heart.

_'You sound just like my mother. She was a bitch.'_

_Your mom grew mad, 'Why don't you do something for this family for once! Maybe then I wouldn't sound like your mother!'_

_Your dad stood up, angry._

_'Watch your tone.'_

_Your mom scoffed._

"Sam? Have you noticed how Y/N had been acting lately? Their scaring me. Had a nightmare but wouldn't tell me what was it about. Y/N had been pretty shaken up."

Sam looked at his brother, "I don't know man. Talk to her."  
  
Dean nodded and went to go get a drink.

_You couldn't believe it. Your mother was gone. Now it was just you and your dick of a father._

_You glared at your dad._

_He shot back his whiskey, slamming the glass down, 'C'm here Y/N.'_

_You walked to him and crossed your arms, your dad yanked your arm, 'Be a good child and go get your daddy more whiskey from the cooler in the basement.'_

_You spat at your father, 'Go get yourself you drunk.'_

_Your dad raised his voice, along with his hand, 'Show your father respect young lady!' He smacked you, your cheek stinging._

You walked in the kitchen where Dean was sat at the table, glass and whiskey bottle on the table. You winced.

Dean looked up at you and smiled, "Sit down please."

You took a seat across from him. Dean poured another drink, missing your flash of unease.

He took it back and sat the glass down, "Y/N... I know something has been on your mind. You can barely even sleep, your lost in your thoughts all the time." Dean took your hand, "Please. Tell me what's going on."  
  
You took your hand back, "I said I was fine."  
  
Dean shook his head, taking another shot, "You're not. You have bags under your eyes. Please baby. Let me help you."

You stood up, "I said I was fucking fine Dean. Leave it alone. If I wanted your help I would have asked for it."

Dean stood up too, slamming his glass down, getting angry, "Well I'm SO sorry that I care for you enough to ask you what's wrong! I just want to fucking help!"

You winced, "I'm fine."

Dean looked at you with a hard stare, "Bull fucking shit you are."

You took a step back, "Leave it alone Dean."

Dean took a step towards you, "Why can't you just fucking let me help? Do you not fucking trust me? Is that it? Well you need to start trusting at one point Y/N or this isn't going to work between us!"

You walked away and Dean went back to drinking.

_You were pulled from your bed, a foot connecting to your ribs. You cried out._

_'Why did you have to kill your mother!? I loved her! And you took her away!'_

_You cried, 'I'm s-sorry!'_

_Your dad kicked you again, flipping you over and straddling your waist, 'You will be.'_

_Your dad punched you. He sent punch after punch to your precious face. Your cries and pleas to stop not having an effect on him. He beat you black and blue, only stopping when you were an inch from passing out._

_'I hate you. You destroyed this family.'_

You walked in the kitchen sometime later and Dean was there again. Though this time he was drunk.

You froze at the site of him, stumbling around looking for more liquor.

"Dean..." Dean shot out of the fridge, banging his head.

"Son of a bitch! Fuck that hurt!"

You started shaking.

Dean turned towards you, "Yes?"

You stuttered, "Maybe you should put the liquor away and maybe go to sleep. Sleep it off."

Dean scoffed, "I can do whatever I want."

You shook harder and took a cautious step towards him, "Please..."

Dean looked at you, "And if I don't? What are you going to do about it? You don't even trust me enough to tell me what's wrong! Why are we even doing this Y/N!?"

Tears started rolling down your face, "I-I I'm sorry Dean. I w-want to tell you. I'm just so scared... I don't want to lose you. You'll know I'm flawed..."

At that moment Sam had walked in and had taken in the scene. He immediately pulled you to him, "Dean... what the fuck?" He looked down at where you were shaking in his arms, tears streaming, "What'd he do?"

You shook your head and Sam looked back at Dean, "Dude are you drunk? It's like 3pm. Go sleep it off Dean. Then apologize for whatever the fuck you did to Y/N when you wake up."

Dean stormed off, slamming the bedroom door. You let out a whimper.

"Sh. It's okay Y/N. He's just a dumbass. He'll realize his stupidity when he wakes up and he'll come and apologize."

You shook your head and looked up at Sam, "He just wanted to help me... I've been dejecting him. It's my fault..."

Sam shook his head, "He shouldn't have gotten drunk and yelled. It's irresponsible. Doesn't matter what you did."  
  
 _Your dad was passed out on the couch. You grabbed your things and ran._

_You were walking when a car stopped next to you. Two nice looking guys were in it._

_"Hey. Do you need a ride somewhere?"_

_You shook your head and kept walking, the driver spoke again, "Are you sure? It's pretty cold to walk somewhere and especially at this time of night. I promise we aren't going to try something. It's just you looked really cold and could use a ride."_

_You stopped walking and thought for a second. IF they did try something you did have your gun... You walked to the back door and got in._

_The one with shaggy hair turned around to look at you, "Where you headed?"_  
  
You shook your head, "Uh I'm not sure. I don't really have anywhere to go. I guess just take me to the nearest train station."  
  
The boy's looked at each other, "Okay..."

_When they dropped you off you were waiting for a train when someone grabbed you around the throat, "Those guy's you were with. Where'd they go?"_

_You struggled, "I-I don't know! They just gave me a ride... I don't know them"_

_"Hey!" The person turned to the shout, opening his back._  
  
His grip loosened and you got away, just in time to see the short haired driver that had given you a ride, stab the guy in the back, lighting his body up.

_You screamed. The shaggy haired guy came up to you, "Hey, hey. It's okay. Its a bad person, well thing."_

_You looked at the two men, "W-What was that! W-Who are you two!?"_

_The short haired man gave you a soft smile, "Want to go to a diner and we can explain?"_

You stared at where Dean was asleep, sitting in a chair next to him.

Dean shifted and opened his eyes, his voice was raspy with sleep, "Hey..."

You looked down, "Hey..."  
  
Dean sat up, "I'm sorry baby. I'm sorry I got drunk and yelled at you but it feels like you don't trust me. You won't let me help you, all I want is for you to be okay..,"  
  
You looked up at Dean, "I know and I'm sorry. I'm just... What if you think I'm flawed when I tell you?"

Dean took your hand in his, staring intently at you, "You are perfect. Please tell me what has been going on."  
  
You proceeded to tell him about your childhood.  
  
At the end Dean was disgusted. Not with you but with himself.

He kissed your face, "I'm sorry sweetheart. God, you had such a horrible childhood. I'm sorry. I know now and I will not drink so much or yell. I'm sorry."

You gave him a small smile, "You don't think I'm flawed?"

Dean shook his head and gave you a sweet but deep kiss, "Never."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading.


End file.
